Over the course of my 40-year nonprofit and ministry career, I have experienced some doubt about whether or not the work I was doing really made a difference. Even now, I look at our world and think – too many are without homes or food or jobs or education. Sometimes church folk still care more about pew cushions and carpets than serving the community. And, I ask myself – has my life’s work been in vain? Did it ever make a difference? Was it worth it?
I imagine John, who is now sitting in prison after 
confronting Herod Antipas (the son of last week’s Herod) about his illicit marriage to his brother’s wife, might be thinking the same thing. I’ve tried and tried to make a difference – doing what I was called to do. Now I’m in jail, and the Messiah is out there – is he really the one who God has promised to send?
Notice how Jesus replies – he doesn’t get on John’s case about asking the question. He doesn’t make fun of him or tell him he is being faithless for having some doubts. He tells John’s disciples to relay to him what they themselves are seeing and hearing in Jesus’ ministry. The blind can now see, the lame walk and the deaf hear, skin diseases are healed, the dead given new life and good news abounds to all who need it. Trust in the hope of what you see and hear for yourselves. Trust in the hope you experience for yourself. Trust that this work is of God and that God is still active in the work of kindom building.
I imagine John was assured by that message but also assured of his own fate – the prisoner would not be released. And John did indeed die in prison. Was it worth it? Was John’s life’s work of preparing people for Jesus worth it?
I sure think Jesus thought so because he turns to the crowd and asks – who do you think John the Baptist was and who were you looking for when you went out into the wilderness? You went out to find that hope of his prophetic message that the Messiah was coming. You went out to find the hope of his prophetic message of justice. You went out to be baptized into a new kind of living. Without John preparing the way, would you be listening to me? Was John’s work worth it? I sure think so.
Is our hope-filled charity and justice work worth it? Is our hope-filled faith formation work worth it? Is our hope-filled faith walk worth it in a world as chaotic as ours is today? How do we hold on to hope when so much feels hopeless? When there seems to be so much to fear?
I know that to answer all of that for myself I have had to rethink what hope actually is – maybe you have too. And, I have found clues from MaryAnn McKibben Dana’s book – Hope: A User’s Manual, from a Facebook comment, and from a quote by Henri Nouwen, a Dutch Catholic priest, professor, writer and theologian.
So here are a few definitions of hope that I know have helped me answer – yes! My life’s work is worth it! Our hope-filled faith work is worth it! Our work makes impact that often we will never know or see. Indeed, most of the time our work is planting seeds of hope and faith formation that we might never see fully blossom.
Those seeds of hope that God is indeed doing a new thing – don’t you see it? Maybe only if we have a better understanding of what hope is – so here goes.
From Henri Nouwen: “Hope is not dependent on peace in the land, justice in the world, and success in the business. Hope is willing to leave unanswered questions unanswered and unknown futures unknown. Hope makes you see God’s guiding hand not only in the gentle and pleasant moments but also in the shadows of disappointment and darkness. No one can truly say with certainty where he or she will be ten or twenty years from now. You do not know if you will be free or in captivity, if you will be honored or despised, if you will have many friends or few, if you will be liked or rejected.
“But when you hold lightly these dreams and fears, you can be open to receive every day as a new day and to live your life as a unique expression of God’s love for humankind. There is an old expression that says, ‘As long as there is life there is hope.’ As Christians we also say, ‘As long as there is hope there is life.'”
From Facebook: “Hope survives every time someone refuses to normalize the unforgiveable.”
From Hope: A User’s Manual: “…hope is not a singular entity but a thousand silvery threads. Small threads, though, amid a lot of gloomy pain (page 54).” “Dayenu [meaning ‘it would have been enough’] doesn’t permit us to take the short view on justice and wholeness, to throw up our hands and say, ‘Oh well, we tried.’
“What it does is invite us to see the grace in each link of the story, to celebrate that whatever else happened, for one miraculous moment, someone chose hope (page 58).” “It’s a paradox—each small task we do, whether it’s familial or societal, does not remake the world. It makes the present moment better, which is no small thing. But hope infuses those modest acts with meaning, not just to alleviate present suffering, but with the audacious goal to construct a new world (page 73).”
So what do we learn from all of this – our very core, our very soul needs to embody and embrace hope as a way of being in this world. Hope is an action we can choose to take each and every day. It might be part of a chain of events from us individually or in community that taken alone might not mean much but taken together partners with God to bring that new thing to life. John didn’t make the world a better place all by himself – he was a link in a much larger story of God’s creation and covenant with God’s beloved children which now includes all of us.
Jesus is part of that story as are countless others, named and unnamed. We are part of that larger story too, but we can only see that it is worth it to be part of that story if we hold on to hope. The kind of hope that trusts that God is still working in the world, still present to us. Rev. Dr. Boyung Lee writes this in her commentary for this week: Hope that trembles is still hope. Even in doubt, John is still a prophet. Even in fear, he is still beloved.
It doesn’t matter if our hope trembles – trembling hope is better than no hope. I have come to the conclusion that my 40+ years of work has been and still is worth it even in the midst of doubt, even in the midst of fear, even in the midst of anger. My hope is in God, trusting that God is still moving and shaking our world and that we are part of that larger story. May it be so.