Conflict is inevitable anytime two or more humans are gathered in the same space. The trouble with conflict though is that it doesn’t always break out into the open – it can be an undercurrent, a parking lot conversation, a piece of gossip. I know I have experienced that kind of conflict – have you?
But aren’t communities of faith supposed to be 
different? Aren’t we supposed to bring conflict out into the open? Aren’t leaders supposed to be the ones that help resolve conflicts? Have you ever heard of the term conflict avoidant? I wonder if most of us would rather hear fingernails on a chalkboard than deal with conflicts!
Jesus was not afraid of conflict – think back to the many times he took on conflict directly, whether it be with religious leaders or even his own disciples. In the beginning of Matthew Chapter 18, Jesus’ disciples come and ask: “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” Talk about wanting to start a conflict within the disciples – you can almost hear it as – am I the greatest? Jesus takes this on directly – he isn’t wishy-washy with his response.
“Then he called a little child over to sit among the disciples, and said, “I assure you that if you don’t turn your lives around and become like this little child, you will definitely not enter the kingdom of heaven. Those who humble themselves like this little child will be the greatest in the kingdom of heaven (vs. 2-4).
We need to be like children – humble in our approach to God and to one another. He goes on to say we aren’t to be the cause, through our words and/or actions, of our fellow believers to stumble and fall into sin. It is also in this chapter that he reminds people that when one sheep out of a hundred goes astray, the shepherd will go after the one – the 99 have each other. The 99 and even the one that goes astray are bound together as a community and that gives them courage to resolve their differences, to care for one another, to hold each other accountable.
Bound together in community should give us the courage to resolve conflicts among and between us, as well as face the inevitable conflict that comes with making hard decisions – whether that conflict be internal or external.
Now internally, as a community of faith, Jesus gives us a process to follow in the verses read today. If someone sins against you, correct them (only if you feel safe doing so). If they don’t listen, gather two or more and go together. This does not mean a verbal beating if you will – remember we are to be humble in our approach. If they still don’t listen, report it to the wider community of faith and if they don’t pay attention to the church, then treat them like Gentiles or tax collectors.
Now please remember how Jesus treated those two groups particularly after he expanded his mission to the Gentiles. Remember he ate with tax collectors – and in fact a tax collector became a disciple. So, no parking lot conversations, harmful gossip, or triangulation – if you have a problem with someone, let them know.
There are always second chances in Jesus’ world to acknowledge our sin, our conflict, our need to repent, to ask for forgiveness or receive forgiveness and reconcile. While the latter is not always possible – I’m thinking of the non-apology – apology. You know the one – it begins “If I offended anyone with my X then I am sorry” rather than “My X caused harm and I am sorry for that. I have taken these steps to correct the harm I have caused.” Or such harm has been caused that while forgiveness is possible, reconciliation is not. And that is OK!
This is not an easy process, and I wonder if conflict resolution is ever an easy process. But the good news in trying to solve conflict is to remember that God is with us in the effort. God is present, Jesus is there and the Holy Spirit gives us the words if we remember to pray and truly embrace the notion that we are not alone. Even the conflict we have and will continue to experience internally and externally can be resolved if we know that God is in the mix with us. If we take the courage of being a community of faith resolved to address the conflict head on, we can hold our heads high. We don’t have to run away from it or try to wish it away, because conflict is a reality.
We stand together as a community of faith, bound together by the courage to address the conflict. We don’t have to be mean about it or call the ones who are in conflict with us nasty names – tempting as that is. We remind ourselves that God has called us to do the work of paying attention to the needs of our neighbors, being an expansively welcoming, inclusive and affirming congregation and living out a faith that says all are worthy of God’s love.
I wonder what ritual we might create that reminds us of that – reminds us that we are bound together as a community of faith and that gives us courage to fight the good fight. Perhaps that is what our passage from Exodus reminds us of today – that ritual practiced over and over again reminds us of how much courage being a community of faith can give us. This is the last plague visited on the Egyptians.
But notice what Moses is instructed to tell the people: They will prepare a meal that allows them to leave quickly, share it with those who don’t have enough, leave no leftovers so that nothing binds them to the past – to staying. Their houses will be marked to protect them just as God will protect them on their journey. They will be dressed to go and they will go out together as a community of faith bound together by the courage to leave.
Then they are instructed to remember this day always creating a festival of celebration to the Lord. A ritual to be practiced every year as the Passover. A reminder of community and courage and the willingness to venture out on an unknown journey. There will be conflict in that journey and the need to address individual and corporate sin over those 40 years. But the community holds because the conflicts are addressed and resolved – not always to everyone’s liking, but nonetheless resolved.
What ritual might we create to remind us that we are a courageous community of faith bound together in Love? What actions and/or words would be in the ritual? My invitation to each of us is to pray about this ritual and send your actions, your words to me. Remember, you are doing the courageous work of community that binds you together.